Aging in America News

| Observations of a Newly Minted Older Person
| Why aging with humor makes all the difference
| Louis Tenenbaum

Welcome to my new column, which sits right in the overlap of my professional life — contractor, designer, counselor, consultant, advocate, and tech CEO — and my lived experience.

I’d been meaning to start writing again when — as happens with so many good things in life — this opportunity just sort of fell onto my keyboard.

Starting in my late 30s, I worked with older adults to update their homes for aging in place. I used to say that work let me “look ahead in the book.” Well, now at 71, I’ve definitely reached those later chapters myself. My circumstances offer plenty of thoughtful moments — and luckily, I’ve slowed down enough to notice them.

Last winter. I was on a ski trip in Solitude, near Salt Lake City, with a couple of the same old suspects — good friends from high school. These annual trips started about 20 years ago, hitting different mountains out West with crews ranging from three to ten, depending on which friends or kids joined that year.

We scored a great condo just steps from the lifts. I’d finished radiation for prostate cancer a few weeks earlier, and, because one medical adventure tends to follow another these days, I was already planning hip replacement surgery. In my excitement to be back on the slopes under those perfect blue skies, I tweaked my knee on the other side on my second run. I’d somehow forgotten that jumps are no longer a good idea.

The irony hit that evening. The beautiful condo had a deep soaking tub–shower combination, but it was a bit scary to use. I didn’t feel safe putting all my weight on my tweaked knee, and I couldn’t swing my bad-hip leg over the high rim. (A grab bar would have gone a long way to make it better.) There I was, skiing six glorious hours with near abandon, surrounded by luxury — and yet a simple shower proved the hardest run of the day.

That moment made me start keeping a list of similar stories — and listening for them among my friends. Have you noticed how often our conversations start with medical updates before we move on to travel plans, pride in our children, or glory in our grandchildren? I not only catch myself using my dad’s mannerisms (oy vey), but I’m also starting to rival the frequency of his doctor appointments.

The big irony, of course, is how good and vibrant I feel — and how happy I am — despite the medical conditions, reduced hearing, and stiff joints. It’s a deep well of reflection and amusement I plan to keep mining. I’m grateful for all I have, especially my sense of humor. That may be the most important prerequisite for aging well.

The Health Benefits of Humor (Mayo Clinic)

More stories — along with practical tips for aging well and thoughts on how aging in place can truly work — will follow in future columns. Please subscribe to Aging in America News and send your comments. Maybe your own moments of irony will give us all a smile.

Louis Tenenbaum is a longtime advocate for aging in place, co-founder of the HomesRenewed™ Coalition, the HomesRenewed™ Resource Center, and HomesRenewed Ventures, LLC and a nationally recognized expert on home modifications that support independent living.